The New Normal

I have got into the habit lately of saying "We''ll do that when everything is back to normal." "We'll go there when all this is behind us." I had my first appointment at The Royal Marsden Hospital this week and was thinking it when I was on the way there. I was quite nervous about the appointment but I shouldn't have been it was a really nice place and everyone was so friendly and kind. I was sitting in the consulting room waiting for the consultant and staring at a print that was on the wall. It was of a wildflower meadow with a stile leading through to a field. It was such a pretty picture I imagined myself running through the meadow, jumping over the stile and walking across the field with my dogs. I'll do that when all this treatment is over I thought.
   I had a long chat with the consultant who explained all the treatment I would have. None of it sounded too terrible but what shocked me was the length of time it was all going to take. I would be having regular blood tests and scans after the treatment and if my blood levels change I may need more treatment. After five years I will not be monitored so often. Five years! That was a long time to wait to run through a wildflower meadow and jump over a stile!
   It has made me realise you can't wait for life to get back to normal, what ever that is. This is my normal now, my new normal. You can't waste any time in life by not doing the things you want to do. I have decided I am not waiting for a date in the future to do the things I want to do. I'm going to do them now in between the scans and the treatment and enjoy every minute. Well I'm off now to look for a meadow to run through and a stile to jump over!